I saw a friend who is going through the BEP chemo treatments and I really realized how far I've come in my recovery because when I saw him weak and hairless, it took me back to were I was -- not being there is a great feeling. But getting where I am now has been incremental -- mentally and emotionally. I still have days when I wonder when/if I will have to deal with the cancer -- like a cloud as an indicator of rain, it makes you wonder when its going to happen. I try not to think about it, but I can't help myself. There are days no matter where I turn there's "cancer" -- a colleague with breast cancer requiring her to have a double mastectomy, a colleague's wife whom lost her battle to the same -- the constant reminder of how far I've come and of the blessing of life.
